QUOTE(Almost Swiss @ Nov 23 2005, 09:39 AM)
Children in school and out get this idea of entitlement, from their parents and their peers. It is harder to keep that idea from a child who is in school (with lots of other "entitled" children) than to keep it from a child at home if you don't believe or do it. But in this day and age, it is really hard to get away from.
Nichole - thanks for your post about the 18 yo sports star who molested a 13 yo. It helps keep things in perspective. I'm not sure I agree with sheltering so much as accompanied experiences with a family vision.....see articles by the Pearls.
Personally I believe that the students usually become like their teachers and peers. So if they are in a school where prejudice is able to dominate, the students become like that. If they are in a home where racism prevails, that is what you will get. If the parents are really following what Jesus taught, to love your enemy (eg the attourney who berates home education, or the local murderer or robber) and walk humbly before their God, then the children primarily taught by these people, (eg at home) will probably end up with that same quality of character by the grace of God.
My older two learned many prejudiced ideas at school (like prejudice against Portugese here in Switzerland), while my younger two (at home) do not even think about the nationality of their friends. It is my 11 yo at home who is concerned about the elections, not his 15yo brother in school. Exposure and appreciation are also cultivated by the parents but can be squashed by peers in school where the big concern is the latest fad of cellphones, etc. Yet at home it is true, that the potential to have a whiny child is there if we don't have the strength to say "no".
Well put! One of my friends put it pretty concisely, "Children become what they see." In other words, worry about the examples YOU set as parents and pay attention to the other significant influences in their lives, such as peers, mentors, role models. But most the important of that group is obviously YOU. If you teach "Do as I say, not as I do" don't be surprised if they do as you do.
However, I want to make it very very clear here that I do not judge either the Bordens or the Ludwigs on their performance as parents. I know nothing of them personally and I would find it hard to base my personal assessment of them upon news reports that could be slanted one way or another to stir up controversy. I've seen situations where individuals have skillfully hidden secrets such as affairs and alcoholism from their spouses; to me, it's not inconceivable that they could have been taken in by their children similarly.