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Fifteen years ago, Holly Payne was hit by a drunk driver, and it changed the course of her life forever. Then 22 years old, Payne had just graduated from the University of Richmond and planned to travel the world and teach in Hungary. She dreamed of becoming an international correspondent.
Those plans and dreams, put on hold following the accident, were followed, but only after Payne spent a year recuperating and learning to walk again.
Payne, now 37, is giving the gift of forgiveness to the driver in the pages of her latest novel, "Kingdom of Simplicity."
The driver who caused Payne's injuries had written asking for forgiveness almost 12 years ago. At the time, Payne said, she thought she could put the driver and the accident behind her.
"It wasn't until much later that I realized that I needed to deal with it," Payne said. "I had to go through the steps of forgiveness for myself."
Over the years, the driver's letter sat tucked away in a desk drawer. But Payne recently decided to answer his request — through her book about a young Amish boy named Eli.
Living in Northern California, Payne has not traveled far from her roots with her latest novel — this is the third for the Lancaster native — a story woven with remembered scenes of Payne's childhood and frequent visits to Root's Country Market and Auction, where she would be intrigued with the ever-present Amish community.
The novel tells the story of acceptance and forgiveness from the viewpoint of Eli, who struggles with denial and anger.
Payne knows these feelings all too well, she said, and wrote the book about Eli's experiences not realizing while she was writing it that it was so close to her own experiences in trying to accept what had happened to her since the accident. She had not even begun the forgiveness process for herself at that time.
The 2006 Nickel Mines school shooting brought all of these feelings to the forefront for Payne, who was working on "Kingdom of Simplicity" at the time.
"I remember getting a call from a friend who told me about the shootings," Payne said in a telephone interview. "I sat glued to the TV and computer and just cried for the horrific tragedy. I wanted to go there in a cathartic kind of way."
The forgiveness of the Amish community spoke to Payne, and it was their actions that prompted Payne to process her own forgiveness of the driver who had taken so much from her.
"I took the letter out of the drawer and had realized that I never responded," Payne said. "I did not write him back, though, until after I had finished the book."
THE PATH TO WRITING
As a young child, Payne struggled at reading, and recalls not being able to read until the age of about 8.
"The switch got turned on between second and third grade," Payne said, noting the Mountville Library summer reading program really inspired her at the time.
"I was always experimenting with creative writing as a kid," Payne said.
College, summer internships and a love for the written word helped Payne to hone her writing and reading skills throughout her later teen years and into her early 20s.
"Holly had the gift of always being able to tell a story," Candice O'Donnell, who taught Payne in a summer English program, said.
O'Donnell, who will introduce Payne at her book signing event in Strasburg (see below), has followed her former student's career with pride.
"I somehow knew that she would be a published writer," O'Donnell said. "She had other dreams of travel, but I saw her telling the stories of her trips through her written words."
However, it was the accident in Crested Butte, Colo., that made Payne look at her future as a writer.
It paved the way for Payne's writing career. As she lay on the road, her body broken in several places, she looked to the sky above Crested Butte and knew she would one day write about that moment.
The driver had hit Payne from behind as she stood on the side of the road talking to two bike riders. She never saw the truck coming and was thrown over the hood of her car. The bikers also were hit.
"I knew that nothing would ever be the same for any of us," she said.
Now Payne runs yearly writing workshops — Skywriter's Writing Workshops — on top of that butte and helps others to write their stories, as well as work on her own.
"It was at that very moment, not knowing if I or the boys were alive or not, that I knew I had to share this with others," Payne said. "It was a pretty pivotal moment in my life."
'KINGDOM OF SIMPLICITY'
Since the accident, Payne has penned three novels, but only "Kingdom of Simplicity" reflects on the events of that day. Her other two books were influenced by other moments in her rich life, travels and people she has met.
Payne is hoping that the story of Eli, the "Kingdom of Simplicity" narrator who is a misguided Amish youth unable to forgive the driver who killed his five sisters, speaks to people about the process of forgiveness.
"It's not an instant thing," Payne said. "I hope the book can be a companion to them wherever they are in the process."
Payne says she hid herself "in the clothing and body of a 16-year-old Amish kid" to write the book.
"I read everything I could get my hands on about the Amish," Payne said.
"I wanted to allow the reader to walk in Eli's shoes."
Payne also turned to local Amish expert Donald Kraybill for research assistance and a deeper understanding of the community.
"The Amish are human," Payne said. "There is no such thing as the perfect Christian, the perfect Jew. The Amish are not perfect either, and Eli illustrates this through his struggles."
Payne, like Eli, has struggled to forgive, but has now moved forward with the release of the book. She's now been married a year, and looks forward to the next chapter with her husband, Dan.
"It takes a lot more energy to stay angry," Payne said. "What I want the world to understand is that the incident does not have power over you."
Payne will sign copies of "Kingdom of Simplicity" at the Strasburg Fire Hall, 46 W. Main St., Strasburg, Saturday, June 6, from 3-6 p.m.
E-mail: cesbenshade@lnpnews.com
